First Time

Alright so I've never really done this before. Other than facebook or myspace I don't really do this sort of thing.....but here we go.

I guess I should tell you about myself. Well I just turned 20 about a month ago. I live in Kansas....and no not in the middle of nowhere Kansas. I live about 20 mins outside of Kansas City. In fact I live in Johnson County Kansas which is one of the richest counties in America...it's like number 3 or 5. Well I live with my parents and 2 of my brothers. I am the youngest of 4 and the only girl...that is until my second older brother, Benjamin got married in June of 2006.

Well I'm 20 so you would assume that I would be a junior in college right. Well actually the only person to go to college in my family was my dad. My brother Benjamin is taking a few classes but because of work he doesn't really have time for it so that just leaves my dad to be the only college graduate in my family of 6. I did apply to several colleges and was turned down due to low test scores and a low gpa when I graduated in 2006. My plan was to go this fall and get a degree in business but that doesn't look like it's gonna happen anytime soon.

Religion is kinda a big deal in my family. Well it was when I was growing up. I was raised Mormon and baptized Mormon however I haven't been to church in about 4 years. I still believe the same things but I don't really practice the standards. I stopped going when I was 16. I wasn't really popular in school or anything. I really was kind of a wall flower in jr. high and starting high school. And at church I was still kind of the weird kid. By the time I was 16 I understood that I wasn't a "normal" Mormon. I started to go less and less to church and then eventually stopped. My parents were a little mad and told me that if I didn't go to church that I would be grounded for the week. So I started going with my brother Ben and his fiance at the time. After about a month of that I stopped going all together and my parents realized that they couldn't do much about it.

I guess the most important thing about me is how I feel towards men and women. About 2 years ago I met this girl who was like a little sister to me. I taught her everything I knew and kind of took her under my wing my senior year in high school. At the time I was dating a guy that I worked with but I started to realized different feelings I had towards both of them. I would tell myself that it was nothing and that I just needed to ignore it. After a few months those feelings didn't go away and they just grew stronger. I started to have feelings for Kaylee that I have never felt with any guy that I dated. I guess the way to describe me is bisexual. I have been dating Kaylee for 1 year and 2 months. I love her. I don't know if it's wrong or right. I don't know what other people think about it. I don't know how my parents will react when I tell them that I'm spending the rest of my life with her. I don't know if they will ever accept me again or love me the way that they use to. But the one thing that I do know and that gets me through every day no matter what is knowing that I have found the love of my life. That I love her more than life and that she loves me too. If you find true love don't take it for granted. Live life to the fullest . Don't waste a day wondering if you can make it in this life. I have Kaylee and I love her and if someone thinks it's wrong just because we're the same sex then they don't know what love is. It shouldn't matter who you love or what they are or what they look like or what they believe the fact that you found love in this world is a miracle and you shouldn't waste it.

Well this is getting pretty long and I'm gonna need something to talk about next time I'll just leave you with that for now.